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Dear God

Michael McFall went to Episcopalian, Lutheran and Baptist church services twice a week for 18 years, attended private Calvary Baptist Christian schools for 15 years, on top of vacation Bible schools, Lutheran summer camps and a few years as an altar boy. Like roommates, he and God have had just about enough of each other -- and every Friday, he'll air his grievances to the arrogant prick (after all, must take a lot of hot air to stay afloat above the clouds).

You used to be cool

Let’s just cut right to the chase. What happened to you, Jehovah (can I call you Joe)? You used to be cool.

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Damn BYU

I know you've been trying this all-inclusive thing, but face it -- your popularity is hurting, and you winning over converts is a popularity contest. Just look at Allah.

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Hating on Heaven

I've been comparing deals for my early Christmas shopping, and I've come to realize a huge problem with your afterlife offer: it sucks by comparison.

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RE: You used to be cool

God's First Response

I wanted to thank you for the candor in your letter, but I'm amused by your lack of foresight. You want me to turn Kanye West into a pillar of salt, but he's doing a much better job of destroying himself.

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Thanks for Nothing

Dear God, Last week’s meteor didn’t kill me. It almost gave me a heart attack, I’ll admit, since I was standing outside when it flew over Utah and turned the midnight sky into day. I haven’t been on anything that’s shown me something like that since high school (emphasis on the adjective). Full story

More like Loserfer

Dear Satan, I’ve been pretty open in my criticism of your upstairs neighbor. I know you guys have a history. Him, with his flowing white beard and robes, kicking you out of Heaven and regulating you to a literal Hell hole -- just another example of the powerful white man pulling the rug out under the red man and sticking him in a crappy reservation. Full story