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Hello. My name is Ryan Shattuck, and I'm a technophile.
Now, I recognize that I should probably use caution when using the suffix "-phile." Several years ago, a person claiming to be a "technophile" would have simply meant that he or she loved technology. Today, claiming to be a "technophile" simply sounds uncouth -- and would probably prevent a person from working with children.
Inappropriate argots aside, I still consider myself a technophile as I've always followed technology very closely. I'm fascinated with neat gadgets and outrageous gizmos and awesome technology and basically any hyperbole stolen from the '80s. Although I realize this obsession isn't necessarily healthy, my fixation could always be worse -- at least I'm not addicted to drugs. Then again, is having a drug problem that much worse than being "addicted" to technology? Sure, buying the newest cell phone or the newest iPod won't leave one's arms with track marks -- but at the same time, being addicted to heroin or cocaine means one doesn't need to buy the newest upgrade.
January is tech month. This week was the International Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas. Next week is the annual MacWorld Conference & Expo in San Francisco sponsored by Apple Inc. At both conventions, technological giants announce this year's newest products, the most advanced upgrades and the most state-of-the-art way to go into debt (But it has a touch screen!). Last year Apple announced the iPhone. This year, technology blogs predict Apple will announce either an iPod that turns a listener invisible or a cell phone that helps the caller find Jesus (using Global Positioning Systems). I wish I could say that I won't be watching an online video of the MacWorld conference. I also wish I could say that the anticipation isn't seeping out of my pores.
It's probably a good thing I use an exfoliator.
What drives this anticipation? From where does this obsession come? As antisocial as my personal tech habits might appear, my devotion pales in comparison to the devotion of many others. When it comes to fandom, I'm a pwned n00b (assuming I knew what a pwned n00b is). Why are so many Apple fans and devotees -- like myself -- passionately dedicated to a computer company? Why did Mac followers camp out overnight to buy Apple's newest operating system upgrade? Is it an exaggeration to compare the community supporting Apple to a cult?
At last year's MacWorld conference, for example, there was a particularly memorable scene in CEO Steve Jobs' presentation when he announced a "revolutionary mobile phone," a proclamation that caused the audience to respond with the kind of enthusiasm and gratitude generally reserved for people being freed from a concentration camp. The MacWorld audience cheered and applauded and screamed and went nuts and then -- as if to highlight the absurd eagerness surrounding a mere cell phone -- a man actually pumped his arm in the air in an Arsenio Hall-esque fashion.
I repeat: A man actually pumped his arm in the air in an Arsenio Hall-esque fashion.
Short of heralding the Rapture, I rarely believe that enthusiasm deserves, of all things, an Arsenio Hall imitation. Nevertheless, this anticipation for the iPhone drove adults to demonstrate enthusiasm in a nonadult manner (what some might call "childish"). As atypical as this might appear, this odd demonstration of tech-passion manifests itself for other products as well:
*The shoppers who do anything to purchase a Wii video game console -- such as waiting all night in the cold.
*Those students who play online computer game World of Warcraft -- for three days straight.
*The households who own a thousand-channel satellite dish -- despite being unable to afford to feed their children.
There's nothing wrong with preferring one particular product or company to another, but what happens when that preference becomes a passion which drives the most fundamental motivation of one's existence? Generations and centuries past, people were motivated by religion, philosophy and politics. Today, people are still motivated by religion, philosophy and politics.
And BlackBerries, video games, and MP3 players.
One can't help but imagine what society would be like if such passion and dedication were instead devoted to issues more important than the most advanced gadget. Would more people vote? Would more people attend church? Would more people be more civically minded? Would the public revolt and demand more from its leaders?
Personally, I recognize that my life would hardly function without my iPhone, a fact I'm willing to admit. Perhaps it's time for me to quit cold turkey. If not, maybe I can at least shift my technology addiction to something slightly less addictive.
Like cocaine.
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