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To everybody gabbing about global warming like it's some apocalyptic, scientific mandate: Please quiet down.
These blowhards-fueled by the media, of course-don't even care that we have yet to be shown any actual evidence of any drastic meltdown. The same "scientists" referenced by the liberally biased, Green Peace-peddling media also told us in the '70s to get ready for the next ice age. These guys are worse than local "meteorologists" who can't even get the five-day forecast right. Picking the weather is like spinning roulette-you're lucky to be right half the time.
Beside that, the world being a couple degrees warmer may not be such a bad thing. There'd be more time to hit up the links and barbecue on the deck. To make sure we don't sacrifice any ski days, we can build giant freezers at all the resorts to keep the snow around. The ability to golf and ski on the same day six months out of the year doesn't sound too awful.
If the Iraq War has taught us anything, it is to question authority and to make sure all the evidence is in before making any rash call for action. Any kind of slight alteration in the way we live could have perilous effects on the world's economy. It could send a ripple that may drive down the stock price of the likes of General Motors and Exxon Mobil.
In fact, by no means is there even a consensus on global warming and its ramifications. Many of the nation's research organizations-like the American Enterprise Institute, Cato Institute and the Science and Environmental Policy Project-all present dissenting reports about the global warming "scare." And, the Center for Study of CO2 and Global Change states that increased carbon dioxide emissions are a good thing for Mother Nature (although it must be noted that Exxon Mobil has donated more than $8 million to such think tanks).
So why should we really care about global warming? I'm sure it makes for great conversation at the next academic conference-add it to the evolution/creation thing and whether Pluto is a planet-but do we really need to be bombarded in the news by some science debate? Just let me know when you know for sure.
What does matter is the here and now. Unfortunately, here and now, people are sucking down harmful toxins like it was 1942 and Pall Mall cigarettes only cost a nickel a pack.
From my vantage point in the Wasatch foothills, I haven't seen any icebergs melting in the Arctic. For a good while in January, I couldn't see the Capitol, either, because of a brown layer of smog.
Quit wasting time debating the merits of global warming and go wrap your lips around the exhaust pipe of a new Dodge Nitro. Find one that has the lift kit (so you don't have to kneel) and tell me how great the buzz is.
Asthma, heart disease and lung cancer are all part of the price of driving around in Escalades and H2s, livin' the dream.
It's tough to say whether pollution is just some tree-hugger hoax concocted by liberals. The increased number of asthma-related emergency room visits in January at Primary Children's Hospital could be part of the grand liberal scheme. And the Department of Environmental Quality, issuing all those unhealthy air days, seems like a squeamish lot-probably a bunch of ex-hippies.
Yet, the side including oil exploration, automobile manufacturers and their respective earnings reports is a difficult one to be on when debating the repercussions of pollution. I'd rather argue for global warming any day.
Regardless of whether 90 percent of the world's scientists have global warming all wrong, the toxic dirt that is emitted into the air is real and it will kill us.
Talk to me about global warming when I can get some coastal property in Nevada. In the meantime, I care about whether the air will be safe enough for my kid to go outside for recess when she's six.
